Just Nico and I

I have an only child this week. My oldest two are at camp. It is just Nico and I most of the day. Mark comes in at night and relieves me from my duties as playmate, entertainment director, activities coordinator, question answerer, conversation partner, reader, cook, snack provider and sole companion.

Actually, it has been a perfect week in many ways. In the mornings Nico has been going to Vacation Bible School in our parish. This has given me an uninterrupted couple of hours to dedicate to a marathon planning session for next year (material for another post).

Normally, when I am in one of those planning session, it is difficult for me to tear myself off what I am doing and pay attention to my surroundings. My mind seems to be on another galaxy where catalogs, websites, books, calendars are the inhabitants.

Knowing myself and my tendencies, I promised myself that I wasn't going to let the opportunity to spend some precious time with Nicolas go by. I don't know if I feel guilty because I don't have as much time to spend with him one on one as I had with the other two. Or maybe as the years pass me by, I realized that the moments spent with our children are just to precious to waste. Or maybe the irony of working hard in planning school for those children that I so love while at the same time yelling at them for needing my attention didn't escape me this time. Or maybe Nicolas is just lucky that his mom is a little wiser this time around.

I have been presently surprised. I have really enjoyed my little guy. I have enjoyed getting into his world. I have loved to share his passions. He is passionately, totally, madly, absolutely in love with baseball. You can see it in his eyes. I spent a good hour on the computer looking for baseball books on our library's website. His face was a poem when next day we went to pick up our stack. We spent a good hour and a half reading baseball books. It was great. After each story I felt my love for baseball, that was dormant, re-awaken. As we read about rules, about kids who love the game, about great ball players like Babe Ruth, Lou Gehrig, the struggles of Jackie Robinson, the courage of Pee Wee Russ, I felt my love for the game soar. There is nothing like rediscovering something afresh through the eyes of a child.

I have loved Nico's company, his incessant conversation, his thoughtful questions, the songs constantly on his lips. The week is not over and we have already gone to the movies, eaten ice cream, tried to weave, made peach preserves,eaten the warm preserves with crackers, listened to music, read some picture books (different from the baseball ones), gone dancing. We have some more plans: some crafts, blueberry picking, a barbecue... The best part, though, are the kisses and hugs with which I have been rewarded this week.

Encouragement: Dealing with Problems God's Way

There are some problems in life that just don't go away. You have tried different approaches.You have tried ignoring the problem. You have tried facing them head on. But nothing seems to work. Then, there are personal and spiritual goals that, no matter how hard you try, they never seem to be any closer. If you let your mind go out of control, you start to think that these problems are unsurmountable. You feel trapped, betrayed, even angry. Anger lead the way to hopelessness and an incredible amount of sadness. You are sad for the opportunities you have lost, for the efforts you haven't made, for the efforts that weren't enough, for the things you didn't try long enough, for your shortcomings, for your faults, your selfishness, and the least could go on and on. You can almost physically feel the battle going on for your soul. You grab for any sense of hope and then you happen to read something that lifts you up.

You find yourself picking up a book you started months ago-one of those never finished attempts- Creative Counterpart by Linda Dillow. She was talking to wives about becoming more like the woman in Proverbs 31. She talked about two approaches to self improvement: the I-Do-All-Myself approach and the I-Let-God-Do-Everything approach. Neither of these approaches will help us to succeed. The approach that will work, she said, is for God to put in his 100% (which of course He always does) and for us to put in our 100%. It is kind of an equation: 100%+100%= Personal and Spiritual growth.

It occurs to you that this is the way of dealing with problems. It reminds you of that saying from a saint "Pray as if everything depends on God, act as if everything depends on you". Then doubts come: "How do I know that God would do his part, his 100%?" Because", you answered yourself, "who He is. Because He is faithful and trustworthy (which means he is worthy of MY trust, right). Because there is no falsehood in Him. Because He does what He said He was going to do. Because He delivers. Because His Word is true. Because He does what He promised He was going to do."

And what is that?
He promised to make you a new creation.
He promised that He shall not fail or desert you (Heb 13:5)
He promised that "God works with those who love him, those who have been called in accordance with his purpose, and turn everything for their good". (Rom 8:28)

And because He encourages us:

"... let us exult, too, in our hardships, understanding that hardship develops perseverance, and perseverance develops character, something that gives us hope, and a hope which will not let us down, because the love of God has been poured into our hearts by the Holy Spirit which has been given to us". (Rom. 5"3-5)

So when you fail in love, you can love with the love of God. What a great hope that is!

And because he invites you to unload your burdens:

"Bow down, then before the power of God now, so that He may raise you up in due time, unload all your burdens unto him, since he is concerned about you (He Cares!)

And because he warns:

"keep sober and alert, because your enemy the devil is on the prowl, like a roaring lion, looking for someone to devour. Stand up to him, strong in faith..."

And more than anything because many years ago you made the decision to not only believe in him but to believe HIM.

When you face love so strong, so faithful, so whole, so healing, you can't but respond with all you've got. You make a decision right now, right here to renew your hope, renew your trust and renew your obedience, knowing that this journey to holiness is a lifelong journey. And you know without a shadow of a doubt that this is not going to be the last time you will be in need of encouragement. How blessed you are that you know where to get the encouragement you need!