Acting as if I love God

In Mere Christianity C.S. Lewis says, " Do not waste time bothering wether you 'love' your neighbor, act as if you do." As soon as I read this line it reminded me of my relationship with God.

Do I love God? Does He love me? those questions have come to me time and time again. To reason God's love for me is not difficult. I can see it in creation. I can see it in the sacrifice of his Son. I can see it in the many details that form my daily life. But, do I love him? Do I return his love? I think my problem is, as Lewis puts it, I "cannot find such a feeling" in myself. I do not have strong feelings of love of God.

C.S Lewis says the answer is to "act as if you did." And I think,without thinking about it, that is what I have done. My choices, my preferences and priorities speak of love. It is not that I have always made perfect choices, or that my priorities are always in order, or that I always prefer that which is good. No, far from it. But, I try. And that counts. And God knows that I try. And that counts too.

Today, C.S Lewis reminds me that,

Christian love, either towards God or towards man, is an affair of the will. If we are trying to do His will we are obeying the commandment, 'Thou shalt love the Lord thy God.' He will give us feeling of love if He pleases. We cannot create them for ourselves, and we must not demand them as a right.But the great thing to remember is that, though my feelings come and go, His love for us does not.

St John Vianney, whose feast day we celebrate today, has a good advice, " your hearts are small, but prayer stretches them and makes them capable of loving God."

I intend to follow it.